(If you haven’t read about the Jane Doe case, I recommend looking into it before reading this article, as this is a reflection rather than a journalistic report.)
Seven men assaulted her. For seven hours, she had no control over her own body. One of them even sent a message saying “free pussy” in a group chat with 50 other men. They knew what was happening but did nothing to help her. And the university only punished them by making them write essays that were likely written using ChatGPT.
The case of Jane Doe and her lawsuit against the Chi Phi fraternity for sexual abuse she suffered at age 20 while a student at Cornell University, has made headlines worldwide. The public reacted with outrage and a sense of powerlessness upon learning how the university handled the case and responded to the seven men involved, or rather, the lack of punishment that truly reflected the gravity of the case.
The entity that was supposed to protect her and ensure she received justice took no action.
And I ask myself:
Where can a woman actually be safe?
At our universities? It seems like we can’t.
On the streets? We grew up knowing we can’t.
On public transportation? We just need to watch news to learn that not.
In our own homes? Unfortunately, not always.
And I think the most concerning part is that we have learned to live with this reality as if it were normal.
I grew up in a country where every week, there were new cases of femicide and violence against women in the news. But I also grew up constantly being taught that women were responsible for the things that could happen to us. There is always something that somehow makes us the ones to blame.
And we can see that in Jane Doe’s case too. Many people blame her: because she went out, because she drank, because she went to the fraternity house.
But why do we always end up asking what the woman did for this to happen? Why don’t we ask what the man did?
And I want to propose a different situation.
If the situation had been reversed, if a drunk man had gone to the house of some female friends at night, do you think he would have been assaulted by seven women?
The answer is no.
It isn’t all men. But when we talk about this type of violence, time and again we find men as the aggressors. Yet our society has grown accustomed to making excuses for men, while we women live in a state of constant survival.
Society tells me, “You’re young. Enjoy your life.”
But how am I supposed to enjoy it when every time I leave my house, my biggest fear is whether I will make it home alive or whether I will be raped?
How am I supposed to simply enjoy my youth when, at the same time, I have to think about how I am going to get back to my room safely?
That is why I imagine a different world.
A world where I don’t have to carry pepper spray in my purse.
A world where I don’t have to run at night to get back to my room because I am afraid someone might be around.
A world where I can wear whatever I want and my clothes do not determine whether I deserve respect.
A world where being a woman does not mean constantly thinking about how to protect myself from other people.
What happened at Cornell and the way the university handled Jane Doe’s case, is only the tip of the iceberg of a much larger system, a system that too often ends up protecting men and those with privilege.
And then the public asks:
Why don’t women speak up when we experience abuse?
Because many times, we feel that justice will not be on our side.
And unfortunately, this type of abuse doesn’t just happen at Cornell. These are cases that exist at every university in the world; in workplaces, schools, homes, and on the streets.
Why isn’t there a single place where a woman can live in peace?
I am tired of hearing society say: “Feminism shouldn’t exist anymore. Women have the same rights as men.” Because the truth is that we do not have the same rights, and even less have the same lifestyle or upbringing.
Instead of only teaching women how to protect themselves, I have a better idea:
Why don’t we raise our boys to be human beings with values and morals, with decency and empathy? Why don’t we teach them not to rape?
Because instead of telling women, “Don’t go out at night,” why don’t we tell men to stay home instead.
It doesn’t sound so nice to have your freedom taken away, does it? Well, that is what women experience every single day.
Cornell, like many other universities, needs to learn how to protect women on its campuses.
Our laws need to understand that the only person responsible for a rape is the rapist.
And our society needs to understand that the fight for women’s rights is not over.
This is for Jane Doe.
For all the women who were once afraid to speak up.
For all the women who were asked what they were doing, what they were drinking, what they were wearing, or why they were there—instead of being asked who hurt them.
For creating a world where a woman doesn’t have to live constantly thinking about how to avoid becoming a victim.
Those seven animals, because I cannot even consider them human beings, deserve prison. I will not care if their futures are ruined, because they did not think twice when they ruined someone else’s life.
Every rapist should be held accountable by the law.
Every victim deserves justice.
And every woman deserves to live a life without fear.
We’re all Jane doe until none of us are.
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